Introducing Sarah Steinberg

column:

Introducing Sarah Steinberg

I’ve been so busy with my new summer friends

By Sarah Steinberg

I’ve been so busy with my new summer friends that I hardly have time for the old ones. But I try to stay in touch. I still see my little Starbucks angel every morning. He floats by me, a cup of Venti Pike in his delicate hands, and it’s as if he doesn’t have feet. He glides across the floor like the whisper of a kiss on a snowflake. When he smiles at me, I flutter my lashes at him, but usually it looks like I’m winking. I pretend I meant to do it, and make the A-OK sign at him. How are you, he chirps, and I frown and show him that my thumb and index finger are touching. Then he furrows his manicured brows at me. Sometimes he’ll roll his eyes. It’s the little things. We’re getting closer.

When I get to work, Stewart the student loan man usually calls. Hey look, we’re going to start dipping into your bank account, Stewart teases. Ha ha ha, I say, you’re so funny! No seriously, Stewart says. We’re going to come to your house and repossess all your stuff. Oh Stewart, I say, you sure make me laugh. Stewart always goes silent when I say that. I’m really not kidding, he says, we’re going to take everything you own. We’ll take your fucking toaster oven. But it’s just this game we play. That’s the part where I hang up on him. The next part is when he calls back and I pretend I don’t speak English. He loves that. We have a thing.

I still make time for my neighbour’s dog Bruce, a fat pug with eyes on the side of his head. Bruce pants and grunts and jumps on my lap whenever he sees me. His face is so ugly that it’s come back around to the other side, where adorable starts. I often wonder what Bruce would be like if he were my boyfriend. Bruce, would you lift the sofa so I can look at the dust bunnies? Bruce, can you chop this Swiss Chard please? Oh Bruce, I’d say, let’s get married. He would wear his little tuxedo. He would stick his paw under his collar to loosen the neck. Goddammit, this thing’s like a straight jacket, he’d say. We would exchange meaningful vows.

Sometimes I stop in at the corner store on my way home and say hi to Tony. He’s an old guy who stands behind the counter with a gardening hose in his hand. He points it at the kids that come in after school. Don’t even think about it, he yells. The kids laugh at him and he growls. When I come in he always smiles. Sarah, he says, where have you been? I’ve missed you, he says, and hands me a cookie. It’s always soaking wet, but I don’t want to embarrass him. Thanks Tony, I say, and just like that, I slide it into my mouth. We’re the best of friends.

17 thoughts on “Introducing Sarah Steinberg

  1. Good morning, Im pretty disturbed about it and Im uncertain if this is the great thing that may probably happen. If you have few new informations with this please email me.(This will be significant in my experience)

  2. Hi – in reality great site you may have created. I enjoyed here posting. I have done desire to publish a remark to express to you the form of necessary . is rather aesthetically delightful. I had been a artist, now i’m a copy editor. We have always enjoyed functioning with information processing systems and am trying to learn code at my time to yourself.

  3. I discovered your blog internet site internet website on the internet and appearance some of your early posts. Continue to maintain within the great operate. I just now additional increase your Rss to my MSN News Reader. Seeking toward reading far a lot more from you discovering out at a later date!…

  4. Howdy are using WordPress for your blog platform? I’m new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and set up my own. Do you require any coding expertise to make your own blog? Any help would be really appreciated!

  5. Excellent post. I was checking constantly this blog and I am impressed! Extremely useful information specifically the last part 🙂 I care for such information much. I was seeking this particular information for a long time. Thank you and good luck.

  6. What youre saying is totally true. I know that everyone should say the same thing, however I simply think that you just put it in a method that everyone can understand. I also love the images you place in here. They match so well with what youre attempting to say. Im sure youll attain so many individuals with what youve acquired to say.

  7. I want to point out my love for your generosity in support of people that need assistance with that question. Your personal commitment to passing the solution across ended up being particularly beneficial and has constantly permitted women like me to arrive at their ambitions. Your new invaluable recommendations entails a great deal to me and much more to my mates. Thanks a ton; from everyone of us.

  8. Hello, you used to write fantastic, but the last few posts have been kinda boring… I miss your super writings. Past several posts are just a bit out of track! come on!

  9. Thank you a lot for providing individuals with an extremely marvellous chance to read articles and blog posts from this blog. It is always very great and as well , jam-packed with a good time for me personally and my office friends to search your web site a minimum of 3 times per week to see the new items you have. And definitely, I am just at all times pleased concerning the superb tips served by you. Some 3 ideas in this post are basically the finest we’ve ever had.

  10. I was just looking for this information for some time. After six hours of continuous Googleing, at last I got it in your website. I wonder what’s the lack of Google strategy that don’t rank this type of informative sites in top of the list. Generally the top websites are full of garbage.

  11. Great blog! Is your theme custom made or did you download it from somewhere? A theme like yours with a few simple adjustements would really make my blog shine. Please let me know where you got your design. Appreciate it

  12. Howdy! I just noticed your website: brokenpencil » Blog Archive » Introducing Sarah Steinberg when I was surfing around stumbleupon.com. It looks as though someone loved your blog so much they decided to bookmark it. I’ll definitely be coming back here more often.

Comments are closed.